THE VALUE OF SILENCE IN MAN'S LIFE By Steven Wise

Introduction

What happened to my life of silence? Social media notifications, Netflix binging, overthinking, and constantly being surrounded by others and overloading our calendars are just many of the infinite ways to avoid silence. We have turned noise into entertainment - it provides a temporary distraction so you cannot pay attention. Every time I enter into silence and meditation, it takes quite a while to be settled, to be calm. In those moments, thoughts of an endless number of tasks that need to be done at my job and my house, would hit my consciousness. Besides, I have special projects, blog posts, videos, and most significantly, people I need to connect with throughout the day. My mind never shuts off, unless I put my foot down and say, “Enough is enough!”

Entering into silence and meditation takes work. It takes discipline and courage to cut through all the little things that distract our minds and hearts, to arrive at a sacred and productive silence. Nonetheless, there are situations where silence could be damaging. This article will not only define and explain silence; it will look into the spiritual, psychological, and social benefits of silence, and so on.

What is Silence?

The Merriam Webster dictionary defines silence to be “a lack of sound or noise, or a situation, state, or period of time in which people do not talk.” It is also “a situation or state in which someone does not talk about or answer questions or give a reply or respond” to something. To me, silence is so ambiguous. It is always ambiguous and it is difficult to understand its true meaning. Hereafter, I will now discuss the benefits of Silence in three different aspects of life:

Spiritual

Psychological

Social

·         Spiritual benefits of silence

“In the silence of the heart God speaks. If you face God in prayer and silence, God will speak to you. Then you will know that you are nothing. It is only when you realize your nothingness, your emptiness, that God can fill you with Himself.” (Mother Teresa). “All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” - Blaise Pascal.

During my spiritual year as a novitiate, we had young persons who stayed under a big roof for working, praying, and learning. It was a year experience, coated with waking up every day by 4:00am. From that moment, every other thing including freshening up, walking into the chapel, getting a seat, and meditating for about 20 – 30 minutes would be done in absolute silence. An invocation for prayers came immediately after these silent activities. Refreshingly, this enlivening experience opened my mind to understanding the role of silence in our spiritual lives.

I always say that in every living being, there is always an inner voice, and it is only in silence and meditation, that man can be able to hear and listen to that inner voice. Often times we fail to recognize there are actually many benefits of silence and lone meditation. It takes courage and strength to face your reality, yet once you do, you will be able to make intuitive decisions and receive clarity without help from others. From my experiences, if you are interested in unloading more dreams – like lucid dreaming and astral projection – it is likely of a chance if you are relaxed and in complete silence.

Meditation is about observing the breath and sensations in the body with equanimity and detachment. During this time, the inner dialogue becomes loud. Images of the past, regrets, insults, achievements and all sorts of old memories will keep coming back. In that deep moment of meditation, there will be deep emotions that you would want to cry; tears will break out without control, and this would be expected. Only in silence - keeping quiet - are we able to see who/what we really are. In silence we can see what is as it is. In silence, we also find peace and happiness (Eric Putkonen). Silence, allows us to focus more easily on our use of energy. Internally it is good to quiet the mind, bring focus of consciousness away from the brain and balance it with the whole body. A complete internal silence may be difficult, yet few seconds into it is bliss and incredibly amazing.

·         The Psychological benefits of silence

Creativity:  Creativity is one of the most important characteristics of being human. It is one of the main traits that make us successful as individuals and as a species. According to Wikipedia, creativity is a phenomenon whereby something new and somehow valuable is formed. The created item may be intangible (such as an idea, a scientific theory, a musical composition, and a joke) or a physical object (such as an invention, a literary work, or a painting). It is blissful to allow thoughts to go where they will, inspirations and wisdom might just pop up. Ideas and innovative approaches may seem feasible yet only through the act of silence can true creativity be birthed.

Awareness of self and environment: Self Awareness entails a clear perception of one’s personality, including strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, beliefs, motivation, and emotions. Self-Awareness allows you to understand other people, how they perceive you, your attitude and your responses to them in the moment. In my recent book “You Too Can Be Happy” I wrote about self-knowledge in chapter 5, pg 70. You need to strip away all of the multiple personalities that you put-on for different people and get down to the core of your essence. You also need to get rid of your own false self-images and delusions.  There is a big difference between "who am I?" and "who do I think I am?" All these about self-awareness is also applicable to your environment. In silence, we become aware of our environs and make proper use of it.

Reflection: by reflection, an ordinary mind will think of the reflective items such as mirror, light, sun, and so on. No! Reflection has a deeper representation. By this I mean the fixing of the mind on some subject, serious thought, or/and contemplation. Yes! I bet you that silence permits the kind of reflection that is beyond ordinary introspection. Careful thoughts or considerations could help you have a change of mind and decide otherwise. A man/woman of reflection could only be a person of silence.

Silence enhances your Self-Esteem:  In my book “You Too Can Be Happy” chpt 5 pg 73, I wrote that, “self-esteem is how we value ourselves; it is how we perceive our value to the world and how valuable we think we are to others. Self-esteem affects our trust in others, our relationships, and our work – nearly every part of our lives. Positive self-esteem, gives us the strength and flexibility to take charge of our lives and grow from our mistakes without the fear of rejection. In silence, one can think and reason to respect his/herself and not underrate the self to oblivion.

·         Benefits of silence in our social lives:

The noise in our society has caused us more harm than good, especially among the youths. From pole to pole, kilometer-to-kilometer, no place seems safe for silence to dwell in the hearts of people.

In marriage and relationships: God designs the sacredness of a genuine marriage and relationship; and in every sacredness, there must be silence. It is in silence that we can discern properly. Sometimes it is only in silence that most problems in marriages and relationships are solved, especially when it involves quarrels between two parties.

In Education: silence can offer deeper and broader learning. It can offer opportunities for students to sit without distractions. Silence helps them absorb content and remember it, as well as think about additional questions. They can process the feelings and ideas expressed by their peers and consider the importance of other perspectives.

I could recall when I was the class leader that I was very good at writing the names of noisemakers in order for them to be punished by our teacher. Ironically, silence was, and is, still commonly used as a punishment for unengaged classes. As schools work to understand how mindfulness can play a role in reducing stress and increasing students’ engagement, it is important to look at the role silence plays in classrooms.

Mental noise is hurting our minds - we are continually asking questions that create busy-ness, not knowledge. We are in ‘reacting modes,’ leaving no room for reflections. Silence is not just lack of noise. It is an empty space for your mind to recover clarity, and to protect it from mental noise. When was the last time you pressed the pause button in your life?

“Silence is the think-tank of the soul” (Gustavo Razzetti).

The Japanese people highly value silence as an essential form of non-verbal communication - it conveys information, emotions and it is a sign of respect and personal distance. In his 2007 paper “The Cultural Significance of Silence in Japanese Communication,” Takie Sugiyama Lebra identifies four dimensions of silence: Truthfulness, Social Discretion, Embarrassment, and Defiance. The first three dimensions are helpful to maintain positive relations while the last one has a negative connotation.

In the Western world however, silence is associated with doubt, loneliness or pain. If you tell your friends that you need silence, they might understand the feeling. But if you don’t answer their messages for 12 hours because you opted to stay silent, they will assume something is wrong with you.

Conclusion:

Animals must listen to survive - that is how we anticipate danger before it happens. Hence, permanent silence is not always good either. Sadly, noise is not just a modern disease; it has been hurting our minds since the 19th century. Back then, a British nurse and social activist, Florence Nightingale, wrote, “unnecessary noise is the cruelest absence of care that can be inflicted on the sick or well.” Nightingale argued that needless sounds could cause distress, sleep loss and panic for recovering patients. Silence plays a great role in our life. It is very useful because, silence has a certain energy to it like no other energy source. It has the power to get people to think and to act, it can help slow the mind, and sometimes it can remove all the frustrations of our mind.

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